


Expectations

by Murmuration77



Series: The Price of Salt: Scenes, during and after [3]
Category: Carol (2015), The Price of Salt - Patricia Highsmith
Genre: Canon Lesbian Character, Canon Lesbian Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Lesbian Character, Lesbian Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-23
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-03-23 01:13:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13776552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Murmuration77/pseuds/Murmuration77
Summary: My foray into Carol and Abby’s past





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Having written about Carol and Abby in an AU (O8 crossover) I was interested in their story. This is part 1 of 2, more to follow very soon.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck”

“Abigail Gerhard will you please stop swearing.”

“No one is around Carol, no one can hear. This stupid fucking car, we’re so late, my dad will go ape shit with me for this…”

“You’re not a child anymore Abby. It’s not your fault that you got a flat, how on earth can your dad be mad about that?”

“You know what he’s like, he’ll find a way to be mad at me. If I was a man I’d be able to change the fucking tyre at least… Gah!!!” Abby tugged at the wrench with all of her strength, straining her neck, her knuckles turning white.

With an angry groan she finally gave up and threw the wrench aside out of frustration. It clattered onto the tarmac of the deserted road, loud in the quiet of the night. The wheel nut was not budging, both women had tried, it was stuck fast. There was no passing traffic, it was gone midnight and they were at least 5 miles from Carol’s house. Abby was staying with her parents for a few weeks while some renovation work was being done at her place, re-living her youth and borrowing her father’s fancy car for the evening. 

“I don’t know why you didn’t come and stay with Harge and I, Abby. Your father pisses you off so much, you always fall out with him if you spend more than a few hours together…”

“Yes and I fall out with your husband too,” Abby muttered under her breath, “What?” Carol hadn’t heard, “Carol, you know how my mom loves it when I visit. She gets lonely…”

“Rubbish, she’s not lonely Abby, she’s always off doing things, parties, Bridge, tennis – didn’t you tell me she’s started painting classes?”

“Watercolor – yes but I’m her only child, I avoid my parents as much as I possibly can, you know that, but she misses me. She had my old room made up before I even said I needed a place to stay, I couldn’t say no…”. Abby had her head in her hands, she was sitting (sweating) cross legged now on the road. Her dark hair clinging to her neck and her face flushed. Carol meanwhile, leaned back against the car, cool as a cucumber, smoking a cigarette and looking impossibly and effortlessly glamorous in her cream dress.

Abby had caused a slight stir at the Country Club by arriving at the charity dinner wearing trousers, not that she gave two shakes about it. Carol Aird was used to her friend’s provocative behaviour and had just smiled, raising her eyebrows slightly when Abby arrived at her house to take her to the function proudly wearing her black slacks. Both women were from such fine and generous families, families who had been members for years and years, that no one at the Club mentioned the – irregularity – of Abby’s attire, not to mention their lack of male partners. 

Carol’s husband, Hargess Aird (who was also, of course, well known at the club), was away on business and Abigail was often alone at these functions but, she was an excellent tennis player and Mr Gerhard had been Men’s Singles’s champion 1915-18. That kind of history could encourage a blind eye to a dress code misdemeanour.

Now though, the two women found themselves miles from the Club and still a long way from Carol’s house but only about a mile from the Gerhard Senior’s residence.

“Come on then woman. Get up off the darned road, we’ll just have to walk to your parent’s house.” Carol pushed herself off the car with her hips and tossed her cigarette on the floor, grinding it under her toe. “I’ll sleep in the guest bed, your mom will be thrilled to see me for breakfast.” She held her perfectly manicured hand out to Abby, grasping her friend’s mucky, clammy one and helping her up from the road. It was true, Abby’s mother had always loved Carol. 

Carolyn Ross was everything that Vivian Gerhard had hoped for in her own daughter. She was beautiful, elegant, poised, calm, obedient, compliant… a whole host of things that her actual daughter was not. Abby and Carol had been friends since they were little girls and Vivian never could work out why they were so thick with each other, what attracted such a good girl to be friends with such a scruffy, feisty, argumentative child as her own daughter. Well, whatever it was, Vivian was pleased for it and had done all she could to encourage their friendship. All the while she was hoping that some of Carolyn would rub off on Abigail. Vivian loved her daughter of course, she just wanted her to calm down; she could see how much easier Abby’s life would be if she followed the path expected of her, the path that Carol was bound to take.

Now both little girls had grown into young women and Carol was steadily and surely gliding down that path. Courted by several fine young men and taking her time to choose the right one, she had married a wonderful and promising man, enjoying a lavish wedding and honeymooning in Europe. The couple had recently moved into a gorgeous new house and Carol had time to oversee its decoration and transform it into a beautiful home. She played tennis, a little golf, pursued her own interests in architecture, art, gardening perhaps. Carol had time to run the house and give dinner parties, helping her husband and supporting the progress of his career. A baby was bound to follow soon. A bouncing baby boy no doubt, to carry on the Aird name, join the Country Club and be the apple of his father’s eye. 

Abigail meanwhile, insisted on working (for Pete’s sake) on living alone and barely paying any attention to the young men who had shown interest. She was beautiful yes, and had her fair share of admirers, but she was far too opinionated. A woman shouldn’t be so… well, so outspoken. Vivian despaired, Roy Gerhard rued his lack of male heir and Carol smiled and loved her friend. The blonde had always admired Abby, the brave little girl who stood up for her against the horrible snobbish girls at their school when they were only 8 or 9. 

Carol had been intimidated by her own parents for as long as she could remember. In constant fear of not meeting their expectations, she was in awe of the way Abby marched to the best of her own drum. Carol had secretly hoped that being friends with Abby would make her more brave and it did but, her ingrained conservatism, her inherent need to please her family and live up to what was required of her was too strong. So she enjoyed living vicariously through her dark haired friend, listening to the stories of her antics. Parties, drinking, boys – girls. Oh yes, Abby enjoyed herself alright and Carol took it all in, fascinated.

As Carol had grown in age she of course grew in confidence. She was no longer the shy, timid little girl that Abby had found crying in the restroom at morning break. She was intelligent, assertive and strong willed but always within reason. Still so constrained by her family and her status she still longed to do something wild and crazy once in a while. Stay out all night, skinny dip in the lake, kiss a stranger perhaps. These things became less likely the older she got. She loved Harge but he had been a conscious choice rather than a heartfelt leap. Carol had weighed her options carefully, was guided by her parents and did feel content with him that much was true. He was kind and dependable, wealthy and handsome. He was a good match. 

Carol thought about her husband as she walked down the middle of the road alongside Abby. The women were walking in silence, Carol carrying her high heeled shoes, she’d taken off her stockings too and her bare feet padded on the tarmac. Abby was smoking alongside her, her brow furrowed as it often was. Carol was waiting for it – whatever “it” was.

“Do you love Harge?”

“Where has that come from?” Carol was intrigued by her friend’s left field question.

“Oh I don’t know. Thinking about mom and dad I suppose. Watching them over the last few days. They barely talk to each other anymore. It’s not that they don’t get along, it’s just that they – I don’t know, they just live alongside each other, they just get on with it.” Abby was gesticulating with her hands as she talked, the way she always did. “There’s nothing _special_ there – I wonder if there ever was.” Abby was exhaling smoke exaggeratedly and looking up at the sky as she was talking, swaying slightly, occasionally knocking into Carol’s arm. “I’m wondering how two people can maintain a relationship for so many years. _Just_ having each other – I mean, that’s a lot to ask isn’t it? To be with one person forever – I mean my mom was what, 19 when she married?”

“Hmmmm,” Carol let her friend talk. 

“I wonder if she had sex with anyone before my father?”

“Abby,” Carol glanced at her friend, her tone remonstrating, “don’t wonder.”

“Well look at you. I mean,” Abby blow a plume if smoke, “you were a virgin when you married Harge.” 

“No,” Carol scoffed and Abby stopped walking and turned to face her. “Carol that does not count. You didn’t do it and you know it.”

“We did,” Carol spoke from the side of her mouth, mid-drag on her cigarette and raising one eyebrow, “I don’t tell you everything, smart ass.”

“Of course you tell me everything, he was too drunk. You would have done it but he wasn’t up to it. He was a complete tool anyway. I’m sure you weren’t missing much.” Abby walked ahead and Carol chuckled. “Don’t you feel you’ve missed out?” Abby looked at her friend over her shoulder.

Carol shrugged and caught up, “Not really. I mean, Harge and I do ok, I don’t really see why I would need to, you know, have a wondrous variety.” She was always wary of answering Abby’s questions. Although Carol was very used to her friend’s direct approach to life, that directness was not often turned on her. Usually Abby shared but did not ask. The brunette squinted as Carol drew alongside her again. Both women had had a fair amount to drink and Abby wobbled slightly. “Hmmm that answer makes me think you do need variety woman. Does Harge make you orgasm?”

“Abby, come on.” Carol was uncomfortable.

“What? Carol, we all deserve good sex. All of us – including you, it’s nothing to be embarrassed about.” Abby held her hands out and raised her eyebrows.

“You’re drunk.” Carol was decisive.

“Carol – I tell you everything. You know all about me, everything I do, everything that I feel – I tell you and I love it, you’re my best friend. Sometimes though,” Abby pointed at her for emphasis, fingers clutching her cigarette, ash flicking everywhere “sometimes you don’t open up to me. You don’t wanna talk about something and so the doors close. “Goodnight Abby.” That’s it Abby. No more.”

“Whatever you say Abby.” Carol was shaking her head and walking away now, Abby slowing down behind her. 

“Whatever you say Abby…” The brunette mimicked her friend with a silly voice.

They rounded the corner and started up the drive to the Gerhard house, their feet crunching on gravel now. Carol slipped her shoes back on protecting her feet from the sharp little stones. They went around to the back of the house, knowing the door would be unlocked there and snuck quietly in. The women made their way up the back stairs (shoes off again now) and padded softly along the corridor. Abby opened the door to the biggest guest room and Carol followed, flicking the light. 

“Shit, it’s not made,” Abby muttered. The bed was bare and rails of clothes were crammed into the room. “Mrs Rance must be rearranging mother’s wardrobe again.” The housekeeper could often be found embarking on pointless endeavours. 

“Let’s try one of the other rooms…” Abby said, turning to leave, but Carol spoke “Abby I’ll just sleep in with you, come on, it’s late and I’m tired,”. Carol’s hand was raised to her forehead, her eyes fluttered shut. 

“It’s a single bed and you snore.” 

“Shut up I do not.” Carol was irritated now, she just wanted to sleep. Ignoring completely her firend’s protestations, the blonde left the guest room and opened the door across the hallway, to Abby’s bedroom.


	2. 2

Carol smiled as she entered the room despite her friend’s protestations. She hadn’t been in here for years and as she flicked the main light on she saw that it was exactly as she remembered. Floral, chintzy and very, very girly. Not “Abby” at all, but completely “Vivian”.

Carol sat on the end of the bed and rubbed her aching foot, dropping her heels on the thick carpet next to the bed. Abby was stepping out of her clothes and leaving them on the floor. “No wonder your poor mother always despaired,” Carol shook her head at her slovenly friend and Abby ignored her, climbing under the covers in her slip and panties.

“Abby, give me something to sleep in would you?” Carol stood up and undid the fastening of her dress under her arm, sliding it from her shoulders and letting it fall, wiggling her hips to assist its progress to the floor. She didn’t want to sleep in her corset, light though it was, and started to undo that too. 

Abby moaned and got out of bed, stomping (quietly) to a chest of drawers and pulling out a silk slip, tossing it to her friend. Carol caught it single handedly whilst holding her corset to her chest. She dropped the underwear and slipped the cool fabric of the slip over her head. 

“Get the light Carol?” Abby said as she turned on the lamp next to her bed and Carol stepped over to switch off the main light before getting in next to Abby. It felt familiar. They had spent many, many nights like this as girls. Giggling into the darkness, talking and laughing, eating smuggled candy and then, when as teenagers, sipping smuggled booze, coughing and spluttering. They lay on their backs, grown women now, looking at the ceiling. 

“I’m sorry I pissed you off Carol.”

“It’s ok.” The blonde didn’t sound convinced. “Turn off the lamp would you.” Carol could feel a headache setting in. Abby reached out wordlessly and the room went dark. She knew her friend well enough to be quiet now and to wait for her to speak. If she was going to.

“Not everyone needs to live like you do Abby, looking for excitement all the time. Some of us can be content living a more – I don’t know – a more normal life. Husband, family, nice house, you know.”

“Content?” Abby was asking.

“Content. Yes. What’s wrong with that?” Carol turned on her side, her hands under her face to look at her friend in the darkness.

“Nothing. Nothing. Content is good.” Abby stared straight up. 

“You’ve always been disappointed in me.” Carol was looking at the brunette’s profile in the dim light. The drapes were thin in here and the moon was bright outside. The window was open and warm air and insect noise floated in from the garden. A sprinkler was on somewhere, Carol could hear its rhythmic whirring. 

“Don’t talk rot.” Abby closed her eyes.

“You have, I know it. Christ, I’m disappointed in myself sometimes.”

“Carol, what are you talking about? Don’t listen to me, I’m just curious. I’m not criticising your choices, I’m just – I don’t know - wondering about a life I’m never going to have.”

“No, you’re right Abby. Your life will be nothing like mine.” Carol rolled onto her back again, both women staring up at the ceiling.

“Well, it wouldn’t do if we were all the same, would it? And I’m not saying one is better, or worse.”

“I can’t be like you.” 

“I’m not saying you should be like me. I don’t mean that at all.”

“I’ve always felt pressure you know?”

“I know you have.”

“Most of it’s from me though, that’s the stupid thing.” Carol laid her hand to her chest. “It’s me, I’m doing it to myself. I don’t even know why.”

“What is it? Doing what? You’re happy with Harge, you’ve said it yourself…”

“I am.”

Carol turned onto her side again, Abby’s face was tilted towards her, brow furrowed again.

“I don’t know what it is Abby. I don’t know why I’ve never been able to let go – why I’ve never been able to find out what I really want. I don’t know what I want.” Carol’s blue eyes searched those of her friend in the darkness. 

“Kiss me Abby.”

“Shut up Carol.” Abby turned her head to the ceiling again.

“I’m serious. Kiss me.”

“Nooo.” Abby closed her eyes. “You’re drunker than I thought. Go to sleep.” 

“I’ve never had a really, really good kiss Abby. I’ve only kissed, what, three men? Including Harge. To be honest only one of those was any good and it wasn’t my husband.”

“And what makes you think that I would buck that trend you nitwit.” Abby was still speaking with her eyes closed.

“I don’t know. I love you. More than any of them.”

“Yes, but it’s not not romantic love Carol, you don’t “love” me, love me.” Abby lifted her hand into the air, emphasising her point.

“I guess.”

“Well. Go to sleep and stop being daft.” Abby tilted her head back towards the blonde and smiled, raising an eyebrow and opening one eye. Carol smiled back at her and rolled over onto her side, her back to Abby. “Be the big spoon then if you won’t kiss me.” 

Abby sighed, “You’re a lunatic.” She posted her arm through the gap Carol made for her between her neck and the mattress and Carol snuggled back into her. Abby slid her hand under the cool pillow by Carol’s head and rested the wrist of her top hand on her own hip, closing her eyes.

“We should have had some water.” Abby could feel a hangover starting behind her eyes, her brain was beginning to rattle in her skull.

“I can’t be bothered to get up now.” Carol said as she reached behind her for Abby’s hand at her hip and pulled it, bringing it under her chin and holding it in both of hers. “We’ll just be hungover. We can just sit by the pool all day tomorrow anyway, I don’t have anywhere else to be.”

“Mmmm sounds good.” Abby was dropping off to sleep, Carol could hear it in her voice. The blonde wasn’t tired anymore. As Abby’s breath settled behind her, Carol held her friend’s hand tighter. 

She bent her head low and kissed Abby’s knuckles lightly. After a few moments of breathing into the darkness she gently opened the sleeping woman’s hand out, uncurling her fingers and placing them onto her skin at the base of her own neck. Carol closed her eyes and felt the warmth of her hand and realised that she wanted the contact. She could feel Abby’s breath, slow and deep behind her, blowing gently on her hair. The other woman seemed to be fast asleep. So, holding her own breath and moving ever so slowly, Carol slid Abby’s hand lower, onto the silk of her slip and then lower still, until it was resting against her breast. The blonde closed her eyes briefly and exhaled softly. She could feel herself hardening against Abby’s palm and felt her friend’s fingers twitch as she slept. Carol tightened her hand over Abby’s, pressing her breast lightly upwards with her hand, her heart thumping faster at the sensations she was creating.

Carol became aware of a knot forming in her stomach and a lurch between her legs, she clenched her thighs tightly and closed her eyes again breathing slowly and heavily. She noticed that the soft breath at her hair had stopped; that the hand at her breast was holding her independently. So she released it and slid her own hand up and under the pillow to find Abby’s. When she met it, her friend’s hand clasped hers tightly and the hand at her breast moved, gently, to capture her hardened nipple in the crook of two fingers. Abby squeezed and lent in to Carol’s neck, kissing her hairline, Carol could feel the woman’s nose pressing into her hair and the blonde took a shaky breath in, lifting her chest up and into Abby’s hand. Carol had no idea of why she was behaving like this, she just knew that her body desperately needed something; needed this.

Abby squeezed tighter, holding Carol’s breast and pushing her hand into her, the pressure on the blonde’s nipple, caught between Abby’s fingers, felt almost unbearable. Carol let out a whimper and stretched her neck, turning her face away and into the pillow. Her hips started to move, wiggling back into Abby’s pelvis, as though moving independently of the rest of her body, they were seeking the other woman out. Abby held her hand under the pillow and then released it to get a hold of Carol’s wrist tightly instead and she stretched the blonde’s arm out and up. Abby’s hand at Carol’s chest slid across to her other breast and Carol turned slightly, head away from the pillow and leaning back onto Abby to allow her access. The brunette stretched Carol out further and bit the back of her neck softly as she cupped her other breast, hardening Carol’s nipple with her finger and thumb. Carol sighed again, her eyes still closed, her thighs trembling now, she could feel wetness gathering between her legs. She was incredibly aroused, she couldn’t remember feeling this turned on before, at least not with another person present. She had gone from annoyed, to tired, to so very aroused in the space of a few minutes. What was wrong with her? The question was only fleeting because Abby’s hand, making its way down her slip, over her stomach and towards her hip, made it very, very difficult to think clearly.

Abby herself had been on the verge of sleep when she felt Carol’s lips at her knuckle. She lay silently, breathing heavily, feigning sleep and waiting to see what would happen. What happened was that her friend surprised her. In all the years of knowing Carol, she had never even hinted at wanting to do anything like this. Never hinted at any interest in Abby, or girls, or much interest in boys either really. She had listened to Abby’s stories with enthusiasm, asked questions, but nothing more. When Abby suggested she come to the party or spend the weekend at the lake, Carol always demurred. What the hell was this then? 

For a split second, the brunette thought about taking her hand away from Carol’s mouth, about rolling over and going to sleep, but while she was thinking Carol was moving her hand down her slip and coming to a stop at her breast. Abby didn’t know how, but she managed to control her breathing – even when Carol definitely squeezed her hand and her nipple hardened against her palm. At that, Abby twitched, she couldn’t help it; her fingers instinctively reacting to the soft flesh underneath them. 

Abby held Carol’s breast in her hand, her heart pounding and her mind racing. _What the fuck?_ She had never thought of Carol like this. Of course she appreciated that her friend was very easy on the eye. In fact the blonde was totally beautiful, she was hands down the most beautiful woman that Abby had _never_ wanted to have sex with. 

Abby always knew that she herself liked girls and boys, well, girls over boys really, she never thought a great deal about it beyond that was how she was. She had found places to go where the people were like her, she just seemed to chance upon them, meet the right people, be in the right places. She never had any shortage of interest but she wasn’t keen on long term relationships. Not now, she was too young. So she enjoyed herself, she worked hard, saw plenty of her friends and had a good time with attractive and interesting people. Now _this_. This was interesting indeed.

The brunette momentarily let instinct take over, she squeezed softly and Carol’s hand left her’s at her breast and found her other hand under the pillow. Abby wove their fingers together as she captured Carol’s nipple and squeezed, eliciting a moan from the woman beneath her. Letting go of Carol’s fingers, she grabbed her wrist firmly and stretched her, reaching down to hold her other breast and leaning forward to bite and kiss the fine downy hair at Carol’s neck. Abby reacted instinctively again when Carol leaned back into her, pressing her ass into her hips and moaning softly. Abby pulled harder on her arm under the pillow and slid her hand down, over her smooth flat stomach and onto her hip where she bunched the fabric of her slip into her fist and sought Carol’s skin with her fingers. 

Abby almost gasped aloud as her flat hand met the soft, warm skin of Carol’s stomach, feeling her muscles twitch underneath and her shaking breath quiver her stomach. Carol pressed her behind harder into Abby as the brunette’s hand pulled them tightly together. Abby released Carol’s arm under the pillow and leant up to bring her mouth down onto Carol’s shoulder, feeling her against her lips. Abby licked, her eyes closed and her hand snaked upwards of its own accord stopping only when it met its mark. As she closed her hand around Carol’s naked breast Abby pressed herself up onto her elbow and the blonde turned right around so that she was on her back looking up at Abby. Carol looked at her friend, and strained her neck to bring their lips together. 

The two women moved together messily but easily, Abby sliding her thigh in between Carol’s legs, her hand moving under the silk as Carol slipped her arm around the brunette’s waist and clasped at the small of her back to bring them closer together. Their kisses were soft and tentative at first, Abby squeezing Carol’s breast tenderly as their lips moved against each other’s. Abby led the dance, brushing lightly with her lips against Carol’s, letting her tongue escape only fractionally to taste. The lightest swipe of her tongue released a breathy sigh from the blonde and Abby responded by probing further, pushing Carol’s head back, Carol opening her mouth wider to let the other woman in. The blonde brought her hand up to Abby’s head, weaving her fingers into her hair and pulling her to her. Abby herself whimpered as she deepened their kiss, her tongue sliding fully into Carol’s open mouth.

As their kiss became wet, Carol moaned louder and the brunette’s skilled fingers became suddenly alive and tweaked and squeezed at the blonde’s nipple. Carol was swept away with the sensation – all of her suddenly alert and _hungry_ , hungry to be touched in a way that she never had been before and hungry to explore the woman beside her. Carol felt her hips move, straining for contact and friction against Abby’s thigh, she was squeezing there and could feel heat between her legs and a tightening in her stomach as Abby’s tongue deftly explored her own. The brunette paused and pulled at the blonde’s slip with her free hand, Carol helping by eagerly grasping the hem and pulling it off over her head. Her blue eyes watched, entranced as Abby’s widened pupils raked over her naked chest, feeling herself colour even in the semi darkness, under the other woman’s gaze. Abby raised her eyes to Carol’s and seemed to suddenly realise who it was she was looking at. She thought for a split second about what was happening, what was clearly about to happen and spoke, “Carol…”

“No” Carol spoke, cutting her off. “No,” 

The blonde reached her hand again to Abby’s head and made to pull it to her but Abby resisted. “Carol, what are we doing?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry I was away for so long. I’ve missed you guys and you know I always love hearing your comments. Talk to me below if you feel the need ;))

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for indulging me and reading, I hope you enjoyed.
> 
> As always, your thoughts are welcome :)


End file.
